I feel sorry for Ivanka Trump

There--I said it. Whew!

Before I say anything further let’s get a few things out of the way.

Yes, I think she is very likely a narcissistic prima donna.

Yes, I think she should pay for the crimes she committed.

No, I wouldn’t likely never want to be her bestie in any way shape or form. But I do feel sorry for her.

(Ya’ll ever notice how he always had his hands on her—sicko)

Why won’t she help her father?

I am writing this to respond to the “Ivanka won’t help her dad because she is a sociopath like him,” crowd. While I believe she is disordered I truly think there are deeper, more complicated reasons why she won’t help him.

Imagine, if you will, a dad who may have not only done non-fatherly things to you, but he may have passed you around like candy to folks like, I dunno, Epstein.

A more than likely scenario—I don’t know too many people who would grow up normal after that.

There is also the golden cage dilemma, being perceived as beautiful, rich and entitled with no real problems—who would listen to her screams about abuse?

Being raped on golden sheets as a child is still rape.

Rape apologists abound

Far too many people make light of the rape that Trump likely bestowed upon Ivanka, cracking jokes and almost making it appear as if she wanted it. GROSS!

Let me get this point straight—even if that were the case today, it was likely not in the beginning.

She was mercilessly groomed.

Trump is a fucking monster. There is no banality of evil there—it is obvious. The Trump kids were raised by a beast—the fallout is no laughing matter.

I grew up in abuse

Saw up close and personal what sexual, psychological and physical abuse does to hearts and minds. Some folks used that pain to propel themselves out of poverty and make somethings of themselves. They became doctors, lawyers, freedom fighters—those stories are rare.

Far too often, victims of violence and phycological harm turned to crime and all manner of things that I will not delve into because the memories are far, far too triggering and traumatizing—my hands shake writing this.

I will say this though—no one goes through any of that unscathed.

No one.

I emancipated at 14

Due to an abusive home life. Took care of and raised my sister all while trying to go to school. Because of this, I didn’t go to college, couldn’t afford to, so I took courses here and there, bought a myriad of books, and educated myself.

Without aid of parents.

So yeah, it irks me when I hear the, “But he is still your father,” argument from folks giving Ivanka dah business for supposedly turning her back on her dad.

I got that same mess when people would ask me about my relationship with my father. Before I could even fully explain why I didn’t have one, there was this whole, “But he’s your dad…” response to my reply.

Family should act like family, friends like friends, a parent like a parent. You are not beholden to be around abusers just because you share blood—you have a right to live in an environment that is safe and free from danger.

If someone is causing pain and danger avoid them, no matter who they are.

Ivanka doesn’t owe her dad a thing if he raped her—she is not obligated to help him nor should she. Who would help their rapist? Why would anyone expect her to do that?

Anyone expecting such a thing is a monster themselves.

As I said, the reasons are complicated here—but it could very well be she is glad to remove the shit stain from her life and finally be freed of him.

The terror of him.

So yeah. I feel sorry for Ivanka Trump—

She and her brothers are tragic figures.

Monsters don’t make good parents. I did love my dad, the good parts of him. I have been able to forgive the not so good parts. The violence he inflicted. All the darkness left by his actions on the psyches of his children.

As my therapist told me, we can call evil by its name—when we do this, we can also understand what evil does to its victims.

No one saved the Ivanka girl child from harm—now she is a warped woman with warped self-perceptions and worldviews.

I can feel sorry for her and still recognize that as a woman she had choices—she made horrid ones—paying for those choices is what makes people grow beyond the scars of their abuse.

Perhaps, if Ivanka pays for the crimes she committed, maybe, just maybe, she can grow beyond hers.